Here are a few of her concepts that illustrate why I like her book so much:
- She gets the situation toddlers find themselves in: using the potty is a total change in a comforting daily routine. Jamie points out that since birth, your child has only known elimination into a diaper. The older they are when you start training, the longer they have been using diapers. WE are excited to move them on, but they can be afraid to sit, afraid to fail, and afraid of the certainty of the diaper always being there. You can’t NOT get it in the diaper! She also gets the power struggle that can be more enticing to an emerging personality after about 30 months of age. Just saying, she gets it.
- Potty training success opens meaningful doors for kids, diapers keep them back. Some great activities and some wonderful schools demand continence to attend. By the time your child is around 3, they can feel inferior if they aren’t trained, but not be able to tell you. They express it with anxiety or anger. If you interpret it as not being ready, you aren’t helping them.
- Some kids will NEVER be ready on their own. I know I am going to get some pushback on this one, and she already says she gets hate mail for saying it. But there is a small subset of kids who will need your firm and loving direction to get started. Waiting for readiness isn’t who they are. If you are the parent of one of these kids, you know she’s right. Your kid hasn’t been ready for any transition or change. You have had to help them and then they were fine. But this is who they are, and instead of waiting until the school makes you train her or your in-laws say something critical to your child, it might be OK to make things happen rather than waiting.
- You must believe that you are doing the right thing by training your child. They can smell your uncertainty, and it will sink your ship. She really sold me on her book with this one. As a pediatric therapist, I know that my confidence is key when instructing parents in treatment techniques for a home program. If I don’t know that I am recommending the right strategy, I know my doubt will show and nothing will go right.
Is your child neurodivergent?
I got you!!
Kids with autism can be challenging to potty train. Now, they have their own book. This is a sensory-motor skill folks, not a behavioral skill. Understanding that, and understanding that using the toilet doesn’t begin and end with elimination is essential to success!
- Learn what true readiness is. It isn’t as high a bar as you might think, but you won’t succeed if you don’t know which skills are essential.
- Get the right equipment. Having the wrong stuff can make an autistic child refuse to train. It can be unsafe too. Use my resource guide as well as my chapters on safety, clothing, and equipment to get it right the first time.
- Start now. My revolutionary strategies of Collaborative Diapering and Targeted Pre-Training make it possible to get going today, building your child’s skills even if formal training is years away.
- Don’t ignore the hard stuff. Many books go lightly on the difficult parts of potty training autistic kids. Smearing and playing with feces, defiance, fears…they don’t have much to offer. I know that these things are keeping you up at night, and you deserve to get help with them. So I have an entire chapter on these things. I face them directly for you!
Where can you find my book?